Wedding Advice

Here is our ever-so-helpful list of dos and don'ts based on real life experiences. Thank you to everyone who contributed. Contact us with your words of wisdom.

The Proposal

  • Do make it short, make it sweet but most of all, make it romantic.
  • Do propose to elope.
  • Don't hide the ring in food. She will either choke, swallow it or break a tooth, any of which will dampen the event. It will be memorable though.
  • Don't be afraid to take the initiative and make the proposal, ladies. This happens more often than you would think.

    The Wedding Shower

  • Do have someone record the gifts for the bride, noting the gift and the giver.
  • Do go easy on the goofy games. Unless you're going retro all the way with food, decorations, paper plate hat, gifts (hey it's a theme) and, yes, games, allow the bride some dignity.
  • Don't hire a stripper. This practice is increasingly taboo. If you know that this is the bride's fondest wish and that her mother-in-law to be and her maiden aunt wouldn't be shocked, then go for it. Better yet, the bride's friends can take her out to a ladies' night another time.
  • Don't try and get the bride tipsy. She'll do that all on her own if that's what she wants.

    The Bachelor Party

  • Do the modern thing and head off for a guys' weekend of golf at one of the many golf resorts that have sprung up everywhere. Substitute skiing, boarding, mountain biking or fishing here.
  • Don't strip the groom of his clothes, attach the old ball and chain and tour him through all the strip joints in town, all the while pouring too many drinks into him and embarrassing him as much as possible. This practice is fast disappearing into wedding lore in did they really do that? 'in the ancient traditions' category.

    The Main Event - the Ceremony

  • Do save the really personal sentiments for a private time with just the two of you, if you are writing your own vows. It will be more meaningful and some of the people at your wedding (think Mom's bridge club, Dad's business associates) don't need to know you that well.
  • Do show up.
  • Do show up on time.
  • Do speak audibly.
  • Don't forget the ring.
  • Don't forget his/her name.

    The Reception

  • Do have someone check the seating arrangements. This would be an ideal task for the mother of the bride or maid of honour. One horror story had mom seated at the back of the room and the "we'll only invite them if we really have to" relatives at the best centre front table.
  • Do double check with catering. Ensure the meal you ordered is the meal that will be served. One unlucky bride was horrified when the wrong meal was served to her guests.
  • Do keep the toasts and tributes clean. Nervous toastmasters often stray into off-colour remarks, shocking the entire room. Be humorous but keep it within the bounds of good taste.
  • Do remember to eat. As the stars of the show, the bride and groom will be drinking, visiting, and dancing and will have to make it through the party without collapsing.
  • Do serve spectacular hors d'oeurves. People remember these far more than they remember the entrée.
  • Do have a lunch reception if you want to keep costs down. People usually drink less in the afternoon.
  • Do book a hall that allows you to bring your own liquor. Ensure that you have the proper permits. Check with your local liquor supplier for government regulations.
  • Do have a cooking school or culinary institute make your wedding cake for you. The cost will be much lower.

    The Photographer and Videographer

  • Do get a personal recommendation.
  • Do a trial run before signing any contracts. Have the photographer take a series of engagement pictures.
  • Do make sure he takes pictures of the people who are important to you. Take the time to acquaint him with these people using photos or assign a member of the bridal party to ensure these people are in the picture.
  • Do get all the details up front. You will be paying a lot of money for these keepsake photos and videos so make sure you get exactly what you want, when you want and know how much you will be paying.
  • Do ask if the photos will be touched up or coloured. More than a few couples have been horrified with their 'fixed' photos.
  • Do ensure that there are disposable cameras on all of the tables at the reception. You will get lots of fun candid shots.
  • Don't forget to keep smiling.

    General Advice

  • Do go for quality over quantity.
  • Do your own flower arrangements if there are budget considerations.
  • Do wear your mother's or grandmother's wedding dress. They will be flattered, it's easy on the budget and best of all, vintage is fashion forward. Think Winona Ryder.